"Bats" is the ninth episode of the B Series of QI and the 21st episode overall. It was first broadcast on BBC Two on 3 December 2004. It marked the first appearance of Josie Lawrence. The episode broke the record for the largest number of forfeits in one episode, and the lowest score Alan (or any panellist) had achieved. It contained 10 forfeits; Alan achieved -72 and the total score of the panellists was -78 points. This record was broken in "Birth", where there were 11 forfeits.


Numbers in brackets mark appearances - e.g. "(2)" means "(second appearance)".

  1. Rich Hall (8): 4 points (joint winner)
  2. Josie Lawrence (1): 4 points (joint winner)
  3. John Sessions (4): -14 points
  4. Alan Davies (21): -72 points


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  • Moth larvae eat clothes.[1] Moths are only a quarter of an inch long. They don't eat synthetic clothing or anything that has been dry cleaned, which is why there are probably fewer of them. They work as well as a mothball.
  • Butterflies are an evolution from moths–they came out during the daytime to avoid being eaten by bats. There are two theories on why butterflies are so called; one is that it is derived from the Dutch word "to excrete butter" and the other is that the most common butterfly when the Anglo-Saxons invaded Britain were yellow.
  • Bats use sonar, shown in an experiment using bells: a pitch black room with bells hung from the ceiling and bats flying around created no noise, but owls did run into the bells.
  • Batology is the study of brambles and blackberries, chiroptology is the study of bats. There are over 1,000 different types of bramble.
  • Batophobia is the fear of being close to tall buildings.[2] Another phobia similar to that is bathophobia, which is the fear of depth.
  • Battology means pointlessly repeating the same thing over again.
  • In Sweden on 1 January 1994, there was the same number of 8 year old girls (112,521) as there were 9 year old girls on 1 January 1995, with no migration or death, which is unique in all population statistics. In Britain during 1994, 8 people were injured by placemats, 13 were injured by cruets, 5 were wounded by dustpans, 8 had bread bin accidents, 5 were injured by sieves, 14 were injured by serving trolleys, 17 for draught excluder injuries, 476 were injured on the toilet, underwear hurt 11 people. Tea cosy damage was down from 3 in 1993 to 0 in 1994.
  • The biggest tourist attraction in Canada between 1934 and 1943 was the Dionne quintuplets.[3] They were 5 girls who were born from a single egg to a poor family. Their father wanted to exhibit them, so the Canadian Government agreed to exhibit them to raise money. The parents got their children 9 years later, but they all left at the age of 18. In 1998, the two surviving quintuplets were given $4 million from Mike Harris as compensation. Stephen mistakenly refers to Mike Harris as Prime Minister of Canada when he was actually Premier of Ontario.
  • In the first recorded Olympic Games in 776 BC, the only event was the 192 m (600 ft) sprint.[4][5][6][7]
  • The winner of the first [recorded ancient] Olympics was Koroibos, who was a chef. Since all the competitors ran in the nude Stephen refers to him as the naked chef.
  • The length of the marathon (26 miles and 385 yards) was dictated by the one run at 1908 Olympic Games in London. The British Royal Family dictated that the race started outside a window at Windsor Castle and the finish line at the White City Stadium. The original marathon ran by Pheidippides who was delivering a message from the Battle of Marathon to Athens. The nearest source came from Herodotus, who was born 6 years later, he claimed that Pheidippides ran from Marathon to Sparta, which was about 145 miles (233 km) and ran back, he also didn't die as many sources claim. It was a myth created by Plutarch 500 years later.

General IgnoranceEdit

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  • The first modern Olympic Games were held in 1850 in Much Wenlock, Shropshire, England[8][9] and arranged by William Penny Brookes of the Wenlock Olympian Society, according to Baron de Coubertin, the man credited with finding the modern Olympics. As a baron, he used his political connections to inform people about the 1896 Olympics in Athens. King George I of Greece sent a silver medal as a prize to the Much Wenlock Games. Brookes died a year before the Athens Olympics.
  • Charles XIV of Sweden had a tattoo saying "Death to kings", because he used to work for Napoleon Bonaparte. Charles XIII of Sweden adopted him, then after he died, he became king and backed away from France, forged an alliance with England and Russia, invaded Norway and his family are still the rulers of Sweden.
  • Harald I of Denmark was the source of the name of Bluetooth technology. (Note: Harald did not unite Finland, Sweden and Norway as suggested by Stephen Fry.)
  • St. Bernard dogs carried barrels of milk.[10] It is a myth created by the tourism industry. Brandy would kill a person with hypothermia. The only evidence of St. Bernard's with brandy is from an 1831 painting by Landseer. The dog in the painting was called Barry, who saved 40 lives, but was killed by his 41st rescuee, who mistook him for a wolf. In his honour, the handsomest dog at the Great St Bernard Pass hospice is named "Barry" in his honour.


  1. Moths
  2. Fear of blackberries
  3. Niagra Falls
  4. Discus
  5. Javelin
  6. Hammer
  7. 200m
  8. Athens
  9. Greece
  10. Brandy
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